Vindicated II

I need to hit 10 posts in one month at least once this year! So here is my opportunity to achieve that on the last day of the month. (=

The last time I wrote about being vindicated, it was a confirmation that I received about going into Bible college. At the time, it was easily the biggest decision that I had ever made in my life. Being the oldest child in a family of three and being the first to move out, it was a huge deal for me and my family. I think that we adjusted quite well; I've now known what the meaning of home really is, and I also know where my heart lies in a lot of things regarding life.

Well, unfortunately, I can't recall everything that came to my mind or all the things I thought about at the time, but the one thing I definitely remember is a sense of peace and comfort. Contemplating Bible college was a thing that occurred over the span of many months, and when it finally slapped me in the face that it was for real, there was no better feeling. It was a tough few months for me in trying to fight what God was telling me about Bible college, and when I finally realized that it was my call, the feeling of liberation was like none other.

So, moving onto the second time I'm revisiting this, it's amazing how things have progressed. Much like my fight with Bible college, I've been battling with another potential major decision in my life for the last few months. Although I can't say that I've been fully revealed the answers, it's getting rather close. I wanted it a certain way, but it looks like God is saying differently - at least for now. Things can change rather quickly; but at the time being, it looks like I need to let go.

It's always tough, and sometimes even frustrating, but when God tries to tell me something, he always teases me with the idea of it first. The idea of Bible college was very small, a whisper. This recent idea was more of a scream. Instead of just quietly and calmly thinking about the idea in the back of my mind like Bible college, it is upfront and right in my face.

God, you are crazy in the way that you do things. I can't say that I agree with your methods all the time, but you know better than I ever will. I've talked about moving on for quite a while now, but my heart never agreed. Now, though, I think my heart has finally caught up a little bit with my head - mostly because I am forced to.

But it's okay, because through this whole process, I'm relearning how to put my trust and faith in the Lord to do things the right way. A while ago, I was so against it and trying to pull the other way, and mostly just because of the circumstances, but had I not been there, I wouldn't be where I am now.

So, while it will be extremely difficult for me to readjust to my prior way of living, I'm set on doing it, even if it takes a bit of extreme measures.