Watch This

Merry Christmas and Happy New Years to everyone who follows my blog! .. And to everyone else too, I guess. Haha.

The year of 2013 has been an absolute blessing for me to have been a part of. All the lessons I've learned, all the things in life I had the privilege of seeing and experiencing, and anything else that's brought joy or pain to me have contributed greatly to building the person I am - and I am grateful.

This was probably the first year where I never really had any time to rest. Everytime I had come home for a couple weeks, whether to take a break or to wait until it was time to leave again, they haven't been all that restful. By the time I was able to relax, it was time to think about what's next.

While I spent 8 calendar months in Assiniboia, I think my entire year can be summed up by one picture. From my winter term, in trying new things, to living in new places and learning independency, there is one visual image that is engrained into my brain that reminds me of why I'm here and why I do what I do.

Imagine this: you've just accomplished something significant in your life, you are standing at the front on a stage, you're absolutely overwhelmed by emotions, and every single person in the room is standing up and clapping for you as you walk off. What a scene, don't you think? We see this a lot on TV and in movies, but we usually have no clue the significance of it until you're actually there as one of the parties or emotionally attached to the situation.

Every picture or capture of an image tells a story. So the reason this visual means so much to me isn't about me basking in all my glory, it's more about how I got there. If you simply went off the basis of this one picture to draw conclusions of how I view myself, then I'm probably just a proud SOB full of myself. So you'll have to listen to the story.

I already talked about my story about the student loans and love offering, and this is just an expansion of that story. Throughout the last couple years, I've been waiting. I've been waiting to see where God would take me, how he would use me. Because I've been nearing the end of my education, there's been chances for me to think about "what's next." I've been working really hard to be absolutely dependent on God, looking to him to see what sort of places and opportunities would give me the best chance at growing; and every time I've had an opinion or something, or shortened my sight a bit, God basically replies with, "watch this."

At school, I didn't think I'd ever be able to be comfortable or open up myself to the people I saw everyday beyond what I had already established as a reputation. God said, "watch this."

I thought that, if it was up to me and I got to choose where I wanted to work after I graduated, it would be realisitic for me to do my internship in BC to try to emulate what might be close to what I'd work with so I can get a good feel for a church there - a best case sceneario. God said, "watch this."

So comes my internship, spending a lot of time trying to find out what I could learn from a small church in a small town in Saskatchewan. God said, "watch this."

Then is the student loans story where you can read two posts down.

Here is where I digress a little bit. Generally speaking, every time I've come home from school for a break or something, I've been very disappointed with my home church and how the state of its spirituality was struggling and not looking up at all. I've been rather worried about where our church was headed due to questionable leadership and an unclear vision. Coming back this time, though, I've seen and heard of some incredibly encouraging things that have my hopes back up for our church. I'm very pleased to see a group of people basically take responsibility and carry the work of the Lord on their backs, saying no to the temptations of letting the state of the church continue to snowball into oblivion. I didn't think it could happen so quickly and with the current leadership. God said, "watch this."

Going into 2014, I'm feeling very encouraged. I'm still scared of what's ahead, but I've already seen what God can and will do so long as I keep my focus and trust in him. If we are real with God, surrendering ourselves completely to him, he will take us to that front of the stage, having people stand and clap, recognizing how good he is to those who are faithful. The feeling is like none other: of absolute humility, in complete awe, unable to comprehend all that's happened, in wonder of why God would bless us so abundantly.

I always wonder why God is so good to me. There are so many people that are much more deserving of the blessings that seem to always end up on my lap; but with it being so, it just motivates me and pushes me to continue pursuing Christ because he has given me life. I pray that my expectations for 2014 will be blown out of the water in the same way they were for 2013.

Happy New Years.