My Ethnicity

Okay, I need to get this out. I was going to bed, already turned the computer off too; but I turned it back on so I can write this out. I realize it's almost 1am, and I'm really tired, but I need to get this out before it does anything bad. I will talk about this once now, and it will also be my in my hopes that it is the last time I talk about it. And also, I think this is as badly or as negatively as I will respond to this topic, so please don't use this blog post and assume that it's how I see things every single time.

Here goes nothing.

I get it, I'm Asian. If you want to be more specific, I'm Chinese; both my parents are from Hong Kong, so I've grown up speaking Cantonese and learning Mandarin in school. Yes, because I'm a second generation Chinese, I will have some heritage that is more pinned towards the Chinese culture. Does this make me any different from anyone else? No.

Growing up, if you were to tell me that I'm Chinese, I probably wouldn't even know what you're talking about. "So?" That would be what you'd hear from me if you were to point it out. It doesn't mean that I am so blind to the fact that I have a different skin color (in all honesty though, can you even say that I'm "different" - different as opposed to what? white?); but the point is that it doesn't even strike me to point out to someone that they're of a different ethnicity. Sure, being in an environment that is predominantly Asian as I grew up will help mask that exposure to "discrimination," but I still never had any issues with it.

The point where I think it has crossed the line is that almost anything said about me, justification for something I do, or whatever, it is ALWAYS because I'm Chinese. I know that you're not trying to be racist or anything, but holy crap do you have to bring it up everytime I do something? You know it's bad that when we gave "awards" to everyone on the floor, and I get the one for being "most biologically Asian." What the hell does that even mean? Do I get to choose to be Asian? Do I make fun of you for something that you do because you're white or black, even in a joking manner? Hell no. If I'm talking to someone on Skype and they just so happened to have a Chinese last name, am I related to them? Can you be anymore shallow? Holy crap, dude.

I didn't think it meant too much, and I didn't want to take it too seriously, but when I start to question my heritage and myself because of the ignorant and pathetic comments that are made, you've gone too far. Maybe because I'm more reserved and don't usually say too much, so you may not know a whole lot about me, but do you really find the need to raise the fact that I'm of a different skin color than you whenever I'm in the conversation? Non-Asians seem to have this obsession (perhaps that's too harsh? Maybe I'll use "infatuation" instead) with the fact that there is an Asian around them. It's almost like they can't believe that someone that has a different descent ethnically than themselves is in existence. I've experienced this for several years now. It's almost like Asians are some type of (divine) creatures that are just so fascinating that they have to point it out. Let me draw up a parallel. When we watch hockey, Sidney Crosby to be specific, we will almost always immediately point out how strong he is on his skates, how amazing he is at reading the play and just how much he can control the game. Crosby has been in this league for many years now, but there is still that fascination people find whenever they watch him - and for his case, he has earned it. I find that the same for being an Asian. People might give me a second glance just because I'm a freakin' Asian. I'm not that special, I didn't do anything to warrant "special treatment" due to my color.

I'm not talking or directing my questions at anyone specific. It's more toward the general social life I have had here at Ambrose. Christian college, eh? Some days I really wonder if a Christian college is even any different from a regular university.

I don't talk to anyone differently, treat anyone differently, or view anyone differently because of their skin color; so why should you? Treat people by who they are as a person, not what they look like or what their ethnicity is.

I'm getting really tired of this; but I'm done now.