Alright, here's the dealio. I'm not going to be doing anything productive for the rest of the day so I might as well do something that doesn't involve just wasting time. Speaking of which, what exactly is wasting time anyway? I don't know; if you think you have an answer, let me know! I realize I'm blogging two consecutive days, bumping up my blog total to four in ten days, which puts me on a torrid streak, but the post I wrote up yesterday wasn't really anything of stuff I really wanted to blog about anyway. So I'll consider this as my third blog for the month. Maybe I'll delete the post yesterday too, because it really doesn't do anything other than take up space. So by the time you're reading this, I'll probably have deleted it; but don't worry, you won't gain anything out of reading it anyway.
Way back when, I said I wanted to talk about being called into ministry. I finally decided to do that; except I think I'm going to try to broaden it up to make it more relatable to everyone, but use my experience of being called as an example. I just wrote part of a paper that dealt with this, so hopefully it's still fresh in my mind. Kind of. I think that for anyone that can come to appreciate blogging, they are probably well enough into their life that they are looking to see where their little life is taking them.
The question is, and always will be, how do you know that God really wants you to do that? God is invisible, you can't see or hear him, how do you know? I'm probably going to refer to my journal a couple times to tell of how I found out. Yeah, that's right. I have a journal too, except it's way more private. No, it's not a diary; it's a journal. Uhh, anyways... If I try to bring ministry into the picture, I think the biggest thing you have to concern yourself about, when you decide if you're really being called into ministry, is that it can't be a back-up plan. What it means is simple: plan A didn't work, so I'll go to plan B. A lot of people who grew up as Christians will usually have a good enough knowledge or foundation of being a theologian, so it's not too entirely hard to carry on with it. A theologian is anyone that thinks about God, that was brought forth by faith and the church. Just because there are people that are in Bible college doesn't mean that they are more "advanced" in faith; it just means they have that passion to know more about it. With me, I think it raised a few eyebrows when I told my family that I want to go to Bible college. Because of my inability to explain to my dad that going into the UofA music program was a mistake, he had to make sure I'm not doing it because music isn't working out. I started my journal in my first year of university. Until today, I have never read through all the things I wrote. I always start a new page when I start writing for the next entry. Multiple times, in my reflection, I have stated that music is just not what God has planned for me - and even though I didn't know what it was, I was sure that God wanted me to do something else. So I just kept waiting. I don't think it's a coincidence that I wrote something to that extent five or six times, in almost the exact wording. I guess that this is how I found out that music was wrong, and Bible college is right. So to bring this back into perspective, do you know if what you're doing right now is what God wants? Does what you're doing right now feel right? If not, why not?
Well, how do I know if what I'm doing is what God's plan is for me? I think it should be noted that even if God is telling you to do something, you have every "right" to not do it. Case in point: Jonah. Being called into ministry is a big deal. God doesn't just want anyone doing it. Again, I'm not saying that it means all pastors, etc. are better than everyone else. I'm still trying to find a good explanation to that, so I'll leave it as is. Well, then what's the difference between God wanting you to be an accountant versus a pastor? First of all, I think that God has given everyone gifts; and he wants us to use those gifts to glorify his name. So if you're good at all that number crunching, God could use you as a witness as an accountant. Would you agree with me that when you find out that someone who holds a high position is a Christian, it just makes you feel all tingly inside? Exactly. Most people won't get to those high positions, but it's about how you treat your relationships in the work place that will affect the way you're seen as a person.
The first, and most "in your face" (to me anyway), way of revelation is hearing it from people. If someone says something to you as a result of something you've done, you might want to take note. Criticism is always taken with a grain of salt, but when things start to get repetitive, you know there is something there. Time and time again, people said that I am good at leading worship. I refused to believe it for the longest time because I just hate listening to myself sing - I think I have an awful voice. But for some reason, it kept coming back. What do people compliment you on?
I'll put prayer as second, because it relates better to me. I kind of wonder, especially with all the busy lives, do you put aside a set time everyday to talk to God? For me, it was always before I went to bed. There can be a lot of arguments against this idea of being filled, but I think it's vital to have a set time because it allows for you and God to recognize that there is a time where you can really get intimate compared to the rest of the day. What does God reveal to you in your prayer? When I was so hateful on studying music, I kept asking God what he wants me to do. Time and time again, he responded by putting a thought of Bible college into my brain. I've even wrote in my journal about the thoughts of Bible college, but I just thought that I was crazy. Again, prayer is a two way conversation, so sometimes it's worth it just to listen to God.
Finally, the general revelation of God is in and through his Word. 2 Timothy says, "All scripture is God breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness." That means that everything in the Bible has a direct relation with God: "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." (John 1:1) When you do your devotions (hopefully you do them), there are always going to be passages that stick out to your more than any other verse. When I read Psalm 46:10, during my times of anger, it immediately popped out of the page because it's so simple in that it says "... Be still, and know that I am God; ..." This verse has been with me ever since; and I know that a lot of people also like what it says in Jeremiah too, "For I know the plans I have for you, ... plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Do you have any verses that pop out of your head when you think of the Bible?
These three things is how I've come to know that God wants me to go into ministry. I'm still not sure as to what exactly God wants me to do in ministry, but I know it's still early and there is time for me to specialize in one part of it. This is getting ridiculously long, so I'm going to try to wrap it up soon. If you've read everything up to here, ask me for a cookie! So that's what it was like for me to find out.What if you're doing something that isn't exactly what God wants from you? What if you went into ministry as a back up plan? Well, I don't really know. I can guess all I want, but it just puts some people in a really bad place. It's been said many times before that if we live in God's light, he's going to give us everything we need to succeed; although that isn't an excuse to not try. If you ask me, I think it's one of those things where you meet someone, and you can just tell after a while. I know there is at least a couple people that we all know that we think, "he/she is just made to do this." I don't know if there's anyone you know that when you look at them, it kind of makes you think, "based on where he's from and who he is, is this really where he's supposed to be?" Let's just hope it's a clash of styles and they didn't use the "easy way out" for when option A failed or didn't work out; although being a pastor is everything but easy, as those who saw it as option B will or have found out.
I don't know. I'm not sure if you're going to get anything out of this, or if it wasn't what you expected. But I hope that what you're doing and where you're going isn't a back up plan or an easy way out. If you would like to share your side of the story, I'm always open! Really, I like listening to people's stories; that's why I'm doing this.
I'm probably going to take a bit of a hiatus from blogging. By hiatus, I probably mean around a week or two at the most... I really have no life, but I desperately need to finish, what is now, six assignments in two weeks. There might have even been some I've forgotten about.
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