Sense of Responsibility

Just need to get rid of some steam..

What good is it to have something you are so passionate about, the burning desire to share it with others so could be enlightened, just to have it completely ignored? I've been doing some thinking last night and this morning and when you look at a church, specifically a congregation, you generally see someone at the top as a leader which is usually a pastor. It is a pastor's job to inform us of the way God wants us to live our lives. A pastor's job is perhaps one of the most difficult in the world because of continuous attacks from not just Satan but people who "don't like your style". It drives me fricken nuts to be a part of a group that fails to live up to what a follower of Jesus is supposed to. Of course no one can live the perfect life that Jesus lived, but we're obviously supposed to strive towards something like that the best we can. We fail, a lot, but it's because of God's love that we can get up each time we fall to try again. When you see a pastor trying so hard to spark the rest of the church into living a better life, just to see and be part of the ignorance that comes after is so frustrating. Time and time again, we're reminded that church is not to only be done on fridays or sundays but every moment of our lives, and time and time again, we go out into our lives, and KNOWING that we should try to live good Christian lives, but choose not to do so. I will be the first to admit that my secular life compared to my church life isn't exactly of the same life. My do believe that my church life is dominant over my secular life but I have to be able to get the "church" aspect over into the secular life to be able to live even fuller of what God wants. When a pastor works so hard trying to reach to a congregation that chooses to ignore for the most part, who's fault is it that we are so weak and faithless? Church is something to be excited about because we get to practice the privilege that we have to be able to worship God freely, but instead all that I see is the appearance of apathetic people who could be much happier being elsewhere. There is almost no evidence of the sense of responsibility that comes with being a follower of Christ and it doens't even seem like it's about to change. The effort does not seem to be there at all when it comes to walking the talk. What good is it to be inspired by someone or something but to ignore it. I'm sure that if we want to accomplish something bad enough, we will take the initiative to go and achieve it, but where is that same want when on the topic of living a Christian life? Okay, fine, sometimes we may have a little streak of living some good days or weeks doing good for God, but a few weeks out of a lifetime is next to nothing. To see someone have to take the fall for something that they intently worked towards is the worst one you can take. Just think about it. You're working so hard to achieve something, to send inspiration, to enlighten people with the knowledge you're blessed with, just to be ignored and ultimately have to take the fall because the people chose not to take on your inspiration and live it up. It's not fair. It's not fair for someone to have to take the fall for something he has no control over. It instills the sense of failure that no one likes to experience. I know, I've been there myself. I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore, that's how angry I am with, I guess mainly myself. But who the hell am I to say anything when I am to blame for someone else's fall?