I'm closing in on completing my first month of minstry here in Vancouver, and it's been nothing but a tremendous adjustment to real life. So far, I've had a lot of fun as well as a lot of challenges. There's no point in me going on to list out everything on each end, but I still often find myself dazed at the fact that I'm actually supposed to be doing a job now. Again, I have to give my thanks to those that have helped me, even when it was unwarranted. It shows that I continue to be surrounded by amazing people that want me to succeed; I appreciate it.
Before I continue, I must make mention of the best concert I've been to. This past Thursday, I went to the Jason Mraz show with a good friend, and if I had to describe the show in one word, it would be "uplifting." I don't even care that I'm one of the more dedicated fans of Mraz, but being at the show really lifted my spirits in a way they haven't been lifted in a long time. Most concerts I go to, the artists do their best to put on a show and have the goal of entertaining with the audience. With Mraz, he does more than that; he has a way of connecting with his fans and really doing life with everyone for the span of the show. I very much appreciated that he made me feel like I, along with everyone else, belonged. On the musical side of things, I also think that his vocals sound on point. He's recovered well from his illness several years ago, and it's really showing how well he can sing. What a night!
Coming back to my life at Newbern, I'm beginning to get a grasp of what the culture of the church is like. There's been more than a few days where I've thought to myself and asked God, "what in the world do I have to offer for this church?" And, I don't ask it with a skeptical tone, though there has been some of it, but I think it's just part of the process of starting at a new position. With where I'm at right now, I'm not even thinking about walking yet; I'm just simply trying to stand up without being wobbly.
I've shared with a few people about how I feel hesitant to dive right into doing things. There's been advice ranging from "yes! Get right in, do as much as you can while people are excited," to "you should wait at least 6 months before even trying to do anything." The answer I'm usually left with at the end of the day is the same question I had just mentioned, "what can I even do, at this point?"
Start small. That's what keeps coming to my mind. I need to develop good habits for myself, build a good routine and solidify my foundation. Basically, I think my first big challenge is to mould myself into what God wants my church to be before I try to get people to do the same - not going to be easy, but fair enough.
To cap off this post, I think I'm going to begin using my blog to help me with my ministry as well. I'm going to try to write down my impressions of things at certain points in time and then refer back to them later on to see if the thoughts still stand. If they do, then there's probably some digging that I can do to move forward with where I need to go and what I need to do.
First of all, there are a few things that are "bylaw" here that have resulted from something happening in the past. While I don't like this philosophy of running a church, I have to comply to it for now. When something happens, and it causes you to change fundamentals in how your church policies go, sometimes to a point of them being completely unbiblical, I find it more restricting than beneficial. At times, it's just flat out wrong; and a big chunk of these issues are one-offs anyway.
The second impression has many little contributing factors. The result of these factors is a sense that the people, especially the younger ones, don't even know what having a pastor is like. I got asked tonight at youth if I have a job. I assumed it was a side job that was being referred to, which I said politely, "no, this is my job." Then the response was, "so what do you do during the week then? Just stay at home?" She wasn't trying to be mean, but she just didn't know better. What a "pastor" means for these kids has always been the person that just comes to speak on Sunday, but have no affiliation with the church otherwise. I actually find this really sad. I've heard about this somewhat ignorant misconception many, many times, but now I've seen it in action in reference to myself.
In the following weeks, I'm going to work hard at coming up with a ministry plan and goal - a playbook, you can say. The English congregation here has no identity and no guidance. One of the elders put it best when he said that it's somewhat in a survival mode. What I do appreciate is that the people are willing. That's all I need. I know that I'm going to ask to do some things that next to no one will like, but the fact that most of them seem willing is all it may take. One hopeless goal I have, though, is to make this place less Chinese. Haha! It's way too Asian for my likes, but I knew this going in.
Saturday, October 25, 2014
Saturday, October 18, 2014
Careful What You Say
There are times where I wonder if having such an analytical personality can affect me in worse ways than good. Regardless of the answer, I think the general sense is that it is good for me to be constantly analyzing situations and events. Having such a curious mind is probably what allows me to learn, or at least be aware of, things quickly. Most of the times that I do all this analyzing work is when I'm given some time to think about it. This is why you'll rarely see me give straight up answers immediately.
Anyways, what I'm getting at is that I'm beginning to see how God is teaching me to be more conscious about what I say and how I say things. It's pretty obvious that I'm a very sarcastic person, and in a very dry way too. I'll admit that I'll be joking about something at least 80% of the time. Part of it is due to my playful nature, and the other part is just that I like to be a bit of a troll. So because I'm sarcastic a majority of the time, people will have trouble realizing if I'm being serious or not. It gets to a point where I could be on the extreme of either end, and no one will know. This is not a good trait to carry onto the pulpit - I'm learning!
Getting to the point! I've vented to a few people about how upset I am that a church emphasizes so much about supporting their pastors so they can succeed and not have to struggle, and yet they go and pay them (what's essentially) minimum wage. I've always held this stance, even before I went into ministry.
However, I made one claim before I got hired that I don't really care about my salary, that I just wanted enough so that I'm living comfortably. Well, I guess "living comfortably" can be gone about in many different ways.
Now that I've accepted the fact that I can't afford maintaining a car with my current salary, I keep asking God what he's trying to help me learn here. I thought, I'm not someone that has issues with spending, nor do I drive wrecklessly. So what could it have possibly been that would make me go through such a hindrance to my ministry in its beginning phases?
It came back to that statement I made, about not caring about how much I would make. It's a rather bold statement, now that I think about it, especially considering I hadn't even stepped foot into the field yet. So God basically used my own humor against me by saying, really? Do you really not care how much you make?
And here I am, indirectly telling my elders board that I need a higher pay in order to support a vehicle.
I lost sleep this past week being angry about the whole situation. But I think this is the one valuable lesson I've learned that I've already seen myself applying to: be honest and be clear, because there's no point hiding things inside letting it boil and grow bitter. Deal with your issues, and (at least attempt to) solve your conflicts. Do it right away too, there's no point in waiting and allow bitterness to build up. The longer you wait, the worse it gets. Even if nothing comes out of your attempt, honesty goes a long way and it's worth knowing that at least you gave it a shot.
For me, this means that from now on I'm going to at least inquire about my salary if I'm candidating at a church. I'll let them know what my stance on a pastor's salary is, the reasoning behind it, and let them decide what they want. I'm going to go nowhere if I just sit my passive butt down and be too polite to speak up when something is not right. I think I had the right mindset when I said I didn't want my salary to be a deciding factor on whether or not I accepted the job because it shows that I'm not greedy for money (I wouldn't be in ministry if I wanted money), and I'm sure they appreciated that I thought this way, but I still have to be able to support myself if I want to do what a church tells me to do. So if that means inquiring about the salary they show me, I'll do it rather than pacing back and forth being upset at them.
... And, I'm pretty much just rambling at this point.
Gotta preach tomorrow, good night!
Anyways, what I'm getting at is that I'm beginning to see how God is teaching me to be more conscious about what I say and how I say things. It's pretty obvious that I'm a very sarcastic person, and in a very dry way too. I'll admit that I'll be joking about something at least 80% of the time. Part of it is due to my playful nature, and the other part is just that I like to be a bit of a troll. So because I'm sarcastic a majority of the time, people will have trouble realizing if I'm being serious or not. It gets to a point where I could be on the extreme of either end, and no one will know. This is not a good trait to carry onto the pulpit - I'm learning!
Getting to the point! I've vented to a few people about how upset I am that a church emphasizes so much about supporting their pastors so they can succeed and not have to struggle, and yet they go and pay them (what's essentially) minimum wage. I've always held this stance, even before I went into ministry.
However, I made one claim before I got hired that I don't really care about my salary, that I just wanted enough so that I'm living comfortably. Well, I guess "living comfortably" can be gone about in many different ways.
Now that I've accepted the fact that I can't afford maintaining a car with my current salary, I keep asking God what he's trying to help me learn here. I thought, I'm not someone that has issues with spending, nor do I drive wrecklessly. So what could it have possibly been that would make me go through such a hindrance to my ministry in its beginning phases?
It came back to that statement I made, about not caring about how much I would make. It's a rather bold statement, now that I think about it, especially considering I hadn't even stepped foot into the field yet. So God basically used my own humor against me by saying, really? Do you really not care how much you make?
And here I am, indirectly telling my elders board that I need a higher pay in order to support a vehicle.
I lost sleep this past week being angry about the whole situation. But I think this is the one valuable lesson I've learned that I've already seen myself applying to: be honest and be clear, because there's no point hiding things inside letting it boil and grow bitter. Deal with your issues, and (at least attempt to) solve your conflicts. Do it right away too, there's no point in waiting and allow bitterness to build up. The longer you wait, the worse it gets. Even if nothing comes out of your attempt, honesty goes a long way and it's worth knowing that at least you gave it a shot.
For me, this means that from now on I'm going to at least inquire about my salary if I'm candidating at a church. I'll let them know what my stance on a pastor's salary is, the reasoning behind it, and let them decide what they want. I'm going to go nowhere if I just sit my passive butt down and be too polite to speak up when something is not right. I think I had the right mindset when I said I didn't want my salary to be a deciding factor on whether or not I accepted the job because it shows that I'm not greedy for money (I wouldn't be in ministry if I wanted money), and I'm sure they appreciated that I thought this way, but I still have to be able to support myself if I want to do what a church tells me to do. So if that means inquiring about the salary they show me, I'll do it rather than pacing back and forth being upset at them.
... And, I'm pretty much just rambling at this point.
Gotta preach tomorrow, good night!
Thursday, October 9, 2014
Avenue of Design
Rarely do I ever get so excited over something based on first encounters. Part of this hype I'll chalk up to my cousin giving me so many options and so many avenues to design my place into something I'd want.
Anyways, when I moved into my place, I was already somewhat interested in seeing how I could use its space to maximum efficiency. At first glance, you'd think that it's a task that anyone and everyone has to do if they want their place to be presentable and welcoming. However, my place offers a slightly different perspective for me given my situation and what the layout of my suite is like.
For the curious people, I have a two bedroom suite that's about 650 sq. ft., and it isn't exactly the most well designed in terms of the structure and architecture. My living space is more or less integrated with the kitchen; or you can say that the living area is just an extension from the kitchen. Therefore, it makes for some awkwardness when trying to divide up the room to create a designated living area. The biggest question I had to ask was, where do I draw the line with how big my living space can be without envoloping my kitchen space? The second question would be, what am I going to do with my 2nd room?
I'll just let it be known now that if I had more time, I probably wouldn't have picked this place. That doesn't mean, though, that I don't like it; it's a great transition suite for me, allowing me to get my feet wet in the logistics of living on my own and having the responsibility of maintaining it. By now, you can probably clue in that I'm likely going to stay here for a year, until my contract is up, and then move onto an apartment. If moving is inevitable, you could argue that I shouldn't put so much effort into designing my place, but I also value the exercise of doing this now so I can do a better job next time. I'm basically creating a new identity with the move to Vancouver, and I need to look after these things on a day-to-day basis so my life is in order. Plus, I need to have people over, so it makes no sense to invite them to a place that looks like trash and chaos.
My cousin, Jon, had an awesome design that would've made my place look great. However, due to a couple of road blocks, we've had to make some adjustments so that the furniture can actually fit without cutting off part of the suite. So the end result will be different, but it's okay. I wish the first design would've worked out, but you can't always get what you wish for, so I'll make it work.
Piece by piece, I've been adding to my place and I can finally start to see the suite resemble an actual home that someone would live in. For the first several days, all I had was a bed and a couch, making it rather awkward to actually spend time in the house. Now, I have a table and a few chairs to actually sit down and allow myself to work on. It's pretty neat.
I know some people have been asking for pictures of my place, and I've been holding out. Truth is, I have a plan for how I am going to show my place to the people that are interested, but it's going to require for me to actually have everything first. So if you don't mind, I hope you can wait just a couple more weeks!
Fact of the matter is, I absolutely love this activity of being able to create my own haven and design my own space. It's such a fun activity that I didn't know I would have interest in, and I really won't mind that I'm likely going to have to move to a different location in a year because I'll get to do it all over again!
Here is a sneak peek, my suite after moving in!
Anyways, when I moved into my place, I was already somewhat interested in seeing how I could use its space to maximum efficiency. At first glance, you'd think that it's a task that anyone and everyone has to do if they want their place to be presentable and welcoming. However, my place offers a slightly different perspective for me given my situation and what the layout of my suite is like.
For the curious people, I have a two bedroom suite that's about 650 sq. ft., and it isn't exactly the most well designed in terms of the structure and architecture. My living space is more or less integrated with the kitchen; or you can say that the living area is just an extension from the kitchen. Therefore, it makes for some awkwardness when trying to divide up the room to create a designated living area. The biggest question I had to ask was, where do I draw the line with how big my living space can be without envoloping my kitchen space? The second question would be, what am I going to do with my 2nd room?
I'll just let it be known now that if I had more time, I probably wouldn't have picked this place. That doesn't mean, though, that I don't like it; it's a great transition suite for me, allowing me to get my feet wet in the logistics of living on my own and having the responsibility of maintaining it. By now, you can probably clue in that I'm likely going to stay here for a year, until my contract is up, and then move onto an apartment. If moving is inevitable, you could argue that I shouldn't put so much effort into designing my place, but I also value the exercise of doing this now so I can do a better job next time. I'm basically creating a new identity with the move to Vancouver, and I need to look after these things on a day-to-day basis so my life is in order. Plus, I need to have people over, so it makes no sense to invite them to a place that looks like trash and chaos.
My cousin, Jon, had an awesome design that would've made my place look great. However, due to a couple of road blocks, we've had to make some adjustments so that the furniture can actually fit without cutting off part of the suite. So the end result will be different, but it's okay. I wish the first design would've worked out, but you can't always get what you wish for, so I'll make it work.
Piece by piece, I've been adding to my place and I can finally start to see the suite resemble an actual home that someone would live in. For the first several days, all I had was a bed and a couch, making it rather awkward to actually spend time in the house. Now, I have a table and a few chairs to actually sit down and allow myself to work on. It's pretty neat.
I know some people have been asking for pictures of my place, and I've been holding out. Truth is, I have a plan for how I am going to show my place to the people that are interested, but it's going to require for me to actually have everything first. So if you don't mind, I hope you can wait just a couple more weeks!
Fact of the matter is, I absolutely love this activity of being able to create my own haven and design my own space. It's such a fun activity that I didn't know I would have interest in, and I really won't mind that I'm likely going to have to move to a different location in a year because I'll get to do it all over again!
Here is a sneak peek, my suite after moving in!
Sunday, October 5, 2014
The Greatest Honor
I've had the dream of moving to Vancouver for almost 10 years. Today was sort of the official day in which I am instated into the position that fulfills the dream. Originally, I would've never thought that I'd come as a pastor; the first time that the prospect of moving to Vancouver was even a possibility was if I were to come here to do music production. Obviously, that never worked out because no one really thought I'd be able to make a career in music that was stable, myself included.
However, today was the installation service for me in becoming a part of the Newbern family and being the English pastor there. I established a connection with Newbern for a little over a month ago, and they've already shown me the level of committment they're willing to give to try to make this relationship work. For that, I'm thankful.
To bring everyone up to date, I got the keys to my place last Wednesday and officially moved in on Thursday afternoon. Right now, I don't have too much because half of my things are still in Edmonton waiting to be brought down, but I have what I need.
I have a bed, a couch, and some kitchen things - essentially the things that will keep me alive for the next while, I have access to, and that's really all I need. I was a little surprised yesterday when I was going to sit down to eat lunch. I sat on my couch, and then thought to myself, "oh, I don't actually have a table to put this plate on." So it was funny to see myself turn a box over and use it as my table, then doing the same with my laundry basket to make a night table.
I've been at work a few days, but there isn't much to talk about. I was introduced to my office space, got caught up on a few things, and am basically in a bit of an evaluation period to get to know the people and see where the needs of the church are.
I'm so eager to start implementing things, but I have to remind myself that these relationships have to be established before I try to organize everything. However, I also can't simply just hang out with people and neglect the ministries. So I'll have to try to find that line of balance where I'm revamping the church structure while getting to know the people.
With the initial impressions I've gathered from the first week-ish, everyone is also eager and anxious to see movement within the church. There's so many different avenues that I could go down to get to where we need to go, so I'll have to choose wisely. I could start with the things on the surface, such as the Sunday worship, the youth gatherings, etc., that would attract people to come and get the numbers up. Or I could take the "back" path and develop my leaders first so that when I go to tackle the bigger things, they're right there with me. There are pros and cons to each, so I think I'm going to be spending the next months seeing where I need to go.
I'm excited. Like I mentioned earlier, this is a dream come true. It's just amazing that so many people have contributed to bringing me to the point of where I'm at. I think of Edmonton, Calgary, Assiniboia, and everything in between.
It's so great and such an honor for me to be able to represent the people God has put in my life.
Bring on the honeymoon period.
However, today was the installation service for me in becoming a part of the Newbern family and being the English pastor there. I established a connection with Newbern for a little over a month ago, and they've already shown me the level of committment they're willing to give to try to make this relationship work. For that, I'm thankful.
To bring everyone up to date, I got the keys to my place last Wednesday and officially moved in on Thursday afternoon. Right now, I don't have too much because half of my things are still in Edmonton waiting to be brought down, but I have what I need.
I have a bed, a couch, and some kitchen things - essentially the things that will keep me alive for the next while, I have access to, and that's really all I need. I was a little surprised yesterday when I was going to sit down to eat lunch. I sat on my couch, and then thought to myself, "oh, I don't actually have a table to put this plate on." So it was funny to see myself turn a box over and use it as my table, then doing the same with my laundry basket to make a night table.
I've been at work a few days, but there isn't much to talk about. I was introduced to my office space, got caught up on a few things, and am basically in a bit of an evaluation period to get to know the people and see where the needs of the church are.
I'm so eager to start implementing things, but I have to remind myself that these relationships have to be established before I try to organize everything. However, I also can't simply just hang out with people and neglect the ministries. So I'll have to try to find that line of balance where I'm revamping the church structure while getting to know the people.
With the initial impressions I've gathered from the first week-ish, everyone is also eager and anxious to see movement within the church. There's so many different avenues that I could go down to get to where we need to go, so I'll have to choose wisely. I could start with the things on the surface, such as the Sunday worship, the youth gatherings, etc., that would attract people to come and get the numbers up. Or I could take the "back" path and develop my leaders first so that when I go to tackle the bigger things, they're right there with me. There are pros and cons to each, so I think I'm going to be spending the next months seeing where I need to go.
I'm excited. Like I mentioned earlier, this is a dream come true. It's just amazing that so many people have contributed to bringing me to the point of where I'm at. I think of Edmonton, Calgary, Assiniboia, and everything in between.
It's so great and such an honor for me to be able to represent the people God has put in my life.
Bring on the honeymoon period.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)