Crazy

Technically, I began my final year of Bible college this month. Even though I'm not directly at school and in classes, I'm still "in school" by being on my internship. So within eight months, my hopes is that I am graduated and liscensed to work in the Alliance denomination.

Just the thought about that possibility is mind blowing. I remember when I first heard thoughts in my prayer about going into ministry. I remember the first couple times I was told that I should consider going to Bible college. The day I moved to Calgary to begin the journey is still so clear to me. All of a sudden, here I am. I'm not done yet, but the next big destination is on the horizon.

And to take it even further, get this: I'll soon be able to basically be working with a lot of people that watched me grow up in the church. That's insane, dude! I will have the opportunity to be working alongside some of the people that I looked up to, people that have helped shape me into who I am today, and people who have been doing the work I've been training to do for basically my entire life.

Finally, the most bizarre thing that I still refuse to accept is that the people who I've always looked forward to seeing on weekends, and certain occasions that would allow me to go to church, will be under my guidance. Not to say that I want to go back to my home church, though the thought of being able to work there is always interesting, but I've always taken a special interest in people who went to church; so in that sense, I go from being a church goer to the one that guides the church goers.

So, to think that being on this internship kind of doing what I've described is already surreal, what would it look like when I'm actually doing it for real? A little frightening, actually. But again, I refuse to back down now. I'm so determined to do the absolute best that I am capable of. I can't even remember being this driven in my life. I guess that kind of being put into the situation has sprouted this inside of me. I'm still the lazy and laidback person that I've always been, but it's a different kind that I never knew I had in me. You might be able to say that I've found my purpose, and with it comes with a bit of swagger to how I carry myself.. I just used the word swagger.

Crazy doesn't even begin to describe what this feels like.

I hope that everyone is taking advantage of the first couple weeks of September to really set themselves up well for this year. The second you fall behind, climbing becomes that much harder.

And remember this: what you do in private makes you either powerful or pathetic.