A bit of a neat way to end off the year's posts, I have been able to think back to not just how this year went, but how the last decade has been for me.
I was blessed with the privilege of connecting my youth to some youth from NEAC this week, and I'm so thankful for the little collision of worlds. One thing God has pressed on my life over the last few years is that church is done as a whole. Just because I'm at Newbern doesn't mean I'm stuck here, or if I'm an NEAC member, I'm not allowed to see church outside of that. Even when I formally became pastor here, I never saw my ministry being just with this one church. Obviously, with the bigness of everything and just how life goes, I haven't been able to establish working relationships with many other churches so far. But it's always been on my mind, ever since my internship, that churches within the same community base need to work together. I've been able to meet several of the pastors near by, but none of us have been able to foster these relationships into something that I'd like. The Church body needs to be on the map in the community and city, so I really don't like that there are so many of us that are isolated and secluded from the people around us.
Yesterday morning, I had one of the more bizarre experiences that I've had so far in my brief tenure as a pastor. In wanting to help the NEAC crew get to my church, I, along with a few drivers whom I'm very thankful for, went to the Skytrain to pick up the group. However, there were a few things that caused them to be about 45 minutes late, so this meant I would be late. So the drivers waited at the station and I just watched the clock tick by. I notified the senior pastor and my worship leader that I'd be late, and they were cool with it.
9:15am... 9:30am... 9:45am.
I'm now late for my own service. But my bigger concern was for the group. I already felt bad that they felt bad for being late. They just got off a 15 hour bus ride and arrived at 7am, how could they possibly have any energy? I don't like being late for things, but this time it was out of my control. So finally, we get everyone together and I try to make it to church as fast as I could in the pouring rain.
We get to church, I walk in and everyone is singing. I literally get to the front, put my stuff down, take my jacket off, the song finishes, and I'm walking up to the front. Talk about the thrill of being one of those celebrities that are fashionably late and make their entrance in style! That's basically what I did. So I compose myself, look up, and see that my congregation has basically doubled in size. And this is when I got excited. I'm generally not a fan of the super big churches with huge gatherings, but something about the increase in numbers really got my blood flowing and levels of joy increasing.
Needless to say, my message probably blew some chunks as I didn't even get to get into the mindset of what I was to preach that morning; but at the same time, it probably wasn't as bad as I thought it'd ended up. The NEAC group is here for Winter Conference this week, and I hope that they will have a great time at the conference. I love it when people I know come for visits because it really reminds me that they still know I exist and that they'd be willing to take the time to check up on me and see how I'm doing.
To bring everything into perspective, I'd found myself thinking back to all the times people ask me why I chose Newbern. This is another one of those questions that I have no idea how to answer. It's amazing, really, because I've recently stumbled across several of the churches that I was in conversation with to potentially work at before Newbern came on the radar. In other words, I basically had forgotten that I'd even spoken to these churches about the opportunity to work there.
So of course, this gets me thinking, "Why Newbern?" I look back briefly at these other opportunities that I had, and I always spend a few seconds to wonder why I didn't pick those but picked Newbern. Aside from only a confirmation that I probably understand, there's really no way for me to explain why I chose this church over the others. It's actually interesting because I look at some of these other churches I had talked to, and there were a couple that are highly regarded churches in the C&MA with many flourishing ministries. Instead, I chose Newbern, a small church that's basically been a family over the last 40 years who have turned all their friendships and brotherhood into a church. I have confidence that I'm supposed to be here and that there is work that I need to do here, and that's really all that matters now.
Hypothetically, you can also imagine what life would be like if I picked a different church to work at. How different would my life be? How different would Newbern be? I know that the "what if's" drive some people crazy because they don't see a point in dwelling on them. For me, it's always cool to dream a little bit, as long as I don't lose focus of where I'm at and what I'm doing.
So in the end, it's crazy to see how several opportunities get served up to us in life and to be able to look back at the ones we decided to reach out and grab. God's been very consistent in helping me decide which ones to take. There's been times where he's left it up to me, and he's completely supported and provided for me whichever path I chose. Vancouver was what I chose, but I get the feeling that God had lead me to picking it from the beginning. So, meaning that even though I was at a point where I was sure God gave me a choice, there really was only one choice - and I'm glad that this is where it lead me to.
Looking into 2016 and beyond, the process of how these opportunities unfold is something I need to remember and put my trust in. God's slowly been revealing to me the start of another searching process that may include many new opportunities; so I need to be diligent in seeing the signs in how he will help me figure this out this time around.
Happy Holidays!
Monday, December 28, 2015
Tuesday, December 22, 2015
Of Longevity
Originally, I had another topic queued up for me to talk about. After allowing the subject to soak for about a week, I decided to postpone it for a bit; I'll explain why when I actually get to writing on it.
The whole thing of longevity is so strange to me. Is it good? Is it bad? How do things last? Why do they last, or why don't they last? Longevity has been something I've thought many years about. The whole idea and issue behind it came to me when I was in high school. At youth group one night, one of the leaders told us about the average lifespan of pastors in Chinese churches nowadays. I don't know why, but hearing the stats shocked me and the feeling of it has stayed with me ever since. I'll chalk this one up to God, preparing me for when I entered ministry.
Wherever we stand on this topic of longevity, I think one thing is pretty clear: it's pretty hard to come by now. I'm not sure I remember the last time I saw or heard any sort of advertisement emphasizing the idea of preservation and commitment. Everything is about getting it new, trying something different, or just turning the page completely. Things in life seem to get dull so quickly because of the rapid turnover rate of just about everything. So whenever we preserve or keep something for a span of time, it just feels odd. Many people can look at things from merely 4 or 5 years ago and call them classics already. I'd say this is especially true in the music industry. There's this one radio ad I hear all the time that more or less says, "We play everything, from the classics *insert Firework by Katy Perry clip* to the newest hits *insert Sorry by Justin Bieber clip.*"
Bringing this topic into the church, or the church into this topic, things start to get even more strange. Here is the conflict that I can't seem to figure out: we crave longevity, and yet it seems to be longevity that often kills the church.
I realize that such a statement isn't universally applicable, but it appears to be a rather prominent thing that is acting as a roadblock for so many church families/communities. In several of the churches I've attended and served at over the last several years, there is one thing that is rather common with the trend of areas that need to be addressed. I'll draw up a scenario. The youth pastor who just started at the church 6 months ago has just quit or was let go. People raise their pitchforks and take stabs at anything and everything, saying that the decision was arrived at too quickly. And on the other hand, the approach to the worship service has been the same for over 20 years, and people are bored of it. There's no new-ness, nothing "fresh" about the service, and has become predictable and boring. Why can't we try new things to liven up the atmosphere? We'll never grow if we remain stuck in the past!
Such cases are happening everywhere. It saddens me that the worshiping of Jesus as our saviour ever gets old - or anything that's related to it, in that matter. When we talk about practicality, is there ever a "just right"? Most of the decisions we make seem to either be premature or overdue. We either act too quickly, or wait long enough to see everything collapse. The only thing I can say to these results and decisions is that when we seem to be too hasty in our choices, we only ever say that we should've given it more time. For the latter, the issue to me isn't when we find that by the time we realize it's too late, we see ourselves scrambling and trying to catch as many pieces as we can while everything falls apart. The real problem is when we try to take back everything we've lost. We end up spending so much time chasing things that will likely never come back that we neglect what we do have and what's coming our way. This is precisely why I think nostalgia can trap us so easily.
At this point, you might be thinking that I lean towards letting go of things sooner rather than later. This isn't necessarily the case because we can also have the tendency to bail out at the first sign of trouble. If one person makes one mistake, all of a sudden he/she is exiled, or something like that.
So, as Newbern is a few weeks from turning 40, these are the questions I'm asking in regards to longevity. It's really important for me to address this because it's a hurdle that will either propel us forward or hinder us. This started when I began wondering how long I'd be here. I'm confident that I will be here as long as I'm needed, but the question is always "how long?" Will I leave before I even make an impact? Or will I overstay my welcome? From determining this, it stems pretty much every action I take and decision I make.
With that being said, I know my mission and purpose is to not focus on how long I'm going to be the English pastor here, but that while I am here, how am I going to prepare for the day that I do leave? I think this mindset has great bearing for an overall approach to life because we all know we're going to be gone one day. For some people, we think they're gone too soon; for others, they can't seem to be gone sooner. We'll never know when that day comes, but in the time being, what are we going to do in preparation for when it does happen?
The answer is quite simple, really. "Let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." (Luke 9:23b) This is how I'm approaching the whole thing of longevity. If we stop living in such a way, then every decision will either be too soon or too late; this is because we don't have peace with it. But with Christ and in him, I know that when the time comes, I want to have the ability to surrender my judgment and trust that his timing is right.
The whole thing of longevity is so strange to me. Is it good? Is it bad? How do things last? Why do they last, or why don't they last? Longevity has been something I've thought many years about. The whole idea and issue behind it came to me when I was in high school. At youth group one night, one of the leaders told us about the average lifespan of pastors in Chinese churches nowadays. I don't know why, but hearing the stats shocked me and the feeling of it has stayed with me ever since. I'll chalk this one up to God, preparing me for when I entered ministry.
Wherever we stand on this topic of longevity, I think one thing is pretty clear: it's pretty hard to come by now. I'm not sure I remember the last time I saw or heard any sort of advertisement emphasizing the idea of preservation and commitment. Everything is about getting it new, trying something different, or just turning the page completely. Things in life seem to get dull so quickly because of the rapid turnover rate of just about everything. So whenever we preserve or keep something for a span of time, it just feels odd. Many people can look at things from merely 4 or 5 years ago and call them classics already. I'd say this is especially true in the music industry. There's this one radio ad I hear all the time that more or less says, "We play everything, from the classics *insert Firework by Katy Perry clip* to the newest hits *insert Sorry by Justin Bieber clip.*"
Bringing this topic into the church, or the church into this topic, things start to get even more strange. Here is the conflict that I can't seem to figure out: we crave longevity, and yet it seems to be longevity that often kills the church.
I realize that such a statement isn't universally applicable, but it appears to be a rather prominent thing that is acting as a roadblock for so many church families/communities. In several of the churches I've attended and served at over the last several years, there is one thing that is rather common with the trend of areas that need to be addressed. I'll draw up a scenario. The youth pastor who just started at the church 6 months ago has just quit or was let go. People raise their pitchforks and take stabs at anything and everything, saying that the decision was arrived at too quickly. And on the other hand, the approach to the worship service has been the same for over 20 years, and people are bored of it. There's no new-ness, nothing "fresh" about the service, and has become predictable and boring. Why can't we try new things to liven up the atmosphere? We'll never grow if we remain stuck in the past!
Such cases are happening everywhere. It saddens me that the worshiping of Jesus as our saviour ever gets old - or anything that's related to it, in that matter. When we talk about practicality, is there ever a "just right"? Most of the decisions we make seem to either be premature or overdue. We either act too quickly, or wait long enough to see everything collapse. The only thing I can say to these results and decisions is that when we seem to be too hasty in our choices, we only ever say that we should've given it more time. For the latter, the issue to me isn't when we find that by the time we realize it's too late, we see ourselves scrambling and trying to catch as many pieces as we can while everything falls apart. The real problem is when we try to take back everything we've lost. We end up spending so much time chasing things that will likely never come back that we neglect what we do have and what's coming our way. This is precisely why I think nostalgia can trap us so easily.
At this point, you might be thinking that I lean towards letting go of things sooner rather than later. This isn't necessarily the case because we can also have the tendency to bail out at the first sign of trouble. If one person makes one mistake, all of a sudden he/she is exiled, or something like that.
So, as Newbern is a few weeks from turning 40, these are the questions I'm asking in regards to longevity. It's really important for me to address this because it's a hurdle that will either propel us forward or hinder us. This started when I began wondering how long I'd be here. I'm confident that I will be here as long as I'm needed, but the question is always "how long?" Will I leave before I even make an impact? Or will I overstay my welcome? From determining this, it stems pretty much every action I take and decision I make.
With that being said, I know my mission and purpose is to not focus on how long I'm going to be the English pastor here, but that while I am here, how am I going to prepare for the day that I do leave? I think this mindset has great bearing for an overall approach to life because we all know we're going to be gone one day. For some people, we think they're gone too soon; for others, they can't seem to be gone sooner. We'll never know when that day comes, but in the time being, what are we going to do in preparation for when it does happen?
The answer is quite simple, really. "Let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." (Luke 9:23b) This is how I'm approaching the whole thing of longevity. If we stop living in such a way, then every decision will either be too soon or too late; this is because we don't have peace with it. But with Christ and in him, I know that when the time comes, I want to have the ability to surrender my judgment and trust that his timing is right.
Monday, December 14, 2015
Of Purpose
What a funny post title. Confession time: I've been listening to Justin Bieber's new album, entitled "Purpose," a lot recently, and have no shame in it. I think the Biebs did a pretty good job this time around. I pick and listen to my music at face value, not based on who the person is. However, the caveat is that an artist's music is typically reflective of their character on many levels.
Having mentioned the Biebs, I'm also sure that many people have seen his recent clips and remarks about the Christian faith. Based solely on what he's said, it's amazing how someone like him has a better grasp on our faith than many who call themselves "Christian." I'm not advocating for Bieber in saying that he has sound theology, because he doesn't, but he understands that at the core of our faith is our relationship with and to Christ. It amazes me that there are Christians who are practically born into the church and still see their lives as to having to earn favor with God. Like, if we do something well, we feel entitled to God's blessings. Nothing's ever going to make God love us more or less, so put away the record book of all the times we think we did something to please God. We all know that in due time, we're just going to grab that book when times are rough and complain to God about why he didn't give us this and that when we were in a good stretch.
Anyways - I'm off the rails a little bit.
In recent weeks, I've been burdened with the whole thing about purpose. If you read the posts I've written since I started titling each entry with "Of...," you'll sense that a lot of my thoughts deal with the intent of addressing purpose behind each topic. What's the purpose behind this or that?
A while ago, I wasn't happy with my daily studies and prayer life. So I began asking God to give me the passion and the desire to be in his word and to find joy in growing closer to him. What I wasn't honest about was that this prayer and request sprouted from comparing myself to some rather big names and highly respected people in the Christian circles. I looked at a lot of these people, somewhat envious of what they seemed to have in a strong and faithful life, and wanted it for myself. So in a moment of teachability, God seems to be responding to me in a way that has lead me to go down the alley of asking me, "what's the purpose of you wanting this?" Do you want to do this so people can look at you and say that you have it all together? Or are you doing this because you truly love me and want to be with me?
In other words, the battle I'm fighting right now is that I am almost using the excuse of getting close with God to be the reason I need to run a good show. Basically, I'm trying to do it all under my power. I'm not intentionally thinking it, but I'm acting in a way that says if I do everything properly, like according to some formula, then people will be drawn to God. So, while a lot of this, I think, is okay, I'm forgetting that it's the Holy Spirit that ultimately draws people to Christ. Therefore, when I don't see the response that I envision from doing something, I get utterly discouraged and upset. By asking for a passion to study the Word based on a slightly skewed reason, it's symbolical to the way I'm approaching things in a way that makes me think I will bring people to God simply by the fact that I'm doing it properly.
Where are the fruits of my labor? This is essentially the complaint that I'm wearing on my heart. So many pastors struggle with this, and I'm no different. I wish I wasn't so selfish in thinking that by putting time and effort in, I should be seeing results. I mean, who am I to be the one who determines if people will gain an affection for God? It's not up to me, and yet I act like it is.
The point here is that I've been so focused on making things work so that people can encounter God, I'm neglecting the purpose of why we want people to encounter him. I'm so concerned with building a beautiful bridge that people will want to cross that I, in many ways, am trying to beautify the pathway more than the destination itself.
I'm having a hard time describing how I feel exactly because I'm not good at putting into words the minor, but important, differences in how I'm running my ministry. So I'll try to use an example to illustrate.
One question I've kept asking over and over is that if I'm and outsider and visiting my church, whether as a one time thing or in search for a church to attend regularly, would I want to stay? I've never had to think long, the answer has always been easy to arrive at. I can get into a lot of reasons and observations that won't help the cause, but there's something else that needs to be unpacked. The question by itself is perfectly reasonable and necessary to ask, but why am I asking this question in the first place? What is the process that has lead me to asking such a question? Am I asking this because I'm curious to know if our church points toward Christ in everything we do? Or am I asking this because I have a presupposition of what a healthy church should look like, and that people who come will speak well of it? Both questions aren't terrible, but it leads me to addressing something I cannot neglect.
What all of this has lead me to is the purpose of why I'm doing anything at all. When I look at my church and the ministry, what's our purpose supposed to be? Are we a church that's just for our group of families and friends to get together? Or do we exist to serve a greater purpose? Christ very clearly said that we need to bring his light into the world, and I just think we too often get caught up in the secondaries that we forget why we do anything to begin with.
God delights in us when we respond in faith; we exist as a church to show people this light. I just don't like that many churches, including my own, have defaulted to either a club that's just for the people who's part of the group, or a clinic where all we try to do is fix people. Let's get back to doing church the way that we are meant to live as Christians: fostering the relationship we have with Jesus Christ.
This was a really hard post for me to write - it took an hour and a half to get some barely comprehensible thoughts onto the page. I'm thankful that I'm in this period of searching, because I know there's learning and growing to be had. And thank you for bearing with me.
Having mentioned the Biebs, I'm also sure that many people have seen his recent clips and remarks about the Christian faith. Based solely on what he's said, it's amazing how someone like him has a better grasp on our faith than many who call themselves "Christian." I'm not advocating for Bieber in saying that he has sound theology, because he doesn't, but he understands that at the core of our faith is our relationship with and to Christ. It amazes me that there are Christians who are practically born into the church and still see their lives as to having to earn favor with God. Like, if we do something well, we feel entitled to God's blessings. Nothing's ever going to make God love us more or less, so put away the record book of all the times we think we did something to please God. We all know that in due time, we're just going to grab that book when times are rough and complain to God about why he didn't give us this and that when we were in a good stretch.
Anyways - I'm off the rails a little bit.
In recent weeks, I've been burdened with the whole thing about purpose. If you read the posts I've written since I started titling each entry with "Of...," you'll sense that a lot of my thoughts deal with the intent of addressing purpose behind each topic. What's the purpose behind this or that?
A while ago, I wasn't happy with my daily studies and prayer life. So I began asking God to give me the passion and the desire to be in his word and to find joy in growing closer to him. What I wasn't honest about was that this prayer and request sprouted from comparing myself to some rather big names and highly respected people in the Christian circles. I looked at a lot of these people, somewhat envious of what they seemed to have in a strong and faithful life, and wanted it for myself. So in a moment of teachability, God seems to be responding to me in a way that has lead me to go down the alley of asking me, "what's the purpose of you wanting this?" Do you want to do this so people can look at you and say that you have it all together? Or are you doing this because you truly love me and want to be with me?
In other words, the battle I'm fighting right now is that I am almost using the excuse of getting close with God to be the reason I need to run a good show. Basically, I'm trying to do it all under my power. I'm not intentionally thinking it, but I'm acting in a way that says if I do everything properly, like according to some formula, then people will be drawn to God. So, while a lot of this, I think, is okay, I'm forgetting that it's the Holy Spirit that ultimately draws people to Christ. Therefore, when I don't see the response that I envision from doing something, I get utterly discouraged and upset. By asking for a passion to study the Word based on a slightly skewed reason, it's symbolical to the way I'm approaching things in a way that makes me think I will bring people to God simply by the fact that I'm doing it properly.
Where are the fruits of my labor? This is essentially the complaint that I'm wearing on my heart. So many pastors struggle with this, and I'm no different. I wish I wasn't so selfish in thinking that by putting time and effort in, I should be seeing results. I mean, who am I to be the one who determines if people will gain an affection for God? It's not up to me, and yet I act like it is.
The point here is that I've been so focused on making things work so that people can encounter God, I'm neglecting the purpose of why we want people to encounter him. I'm so concerned with building a beautiful bridge that people will want to cross that I, in many ways, am trying to beautify the pathway more than the destination itself.
I'm having a hard time describing how I feel exactly because I'm not good at putting into words the minor, but important, differences in how I'm running my ministry. So I'll try to use an example to illustrate.
One question I've kept asking over and over is that if I'm and outsider and visiting my church, whether as a one time thing or in search for a church to attend regularly, would I want to stay? I've never had to think long, the answer has always been easy to arrive at. I can get into a lot of reasons and observations that won't help the cause, but there's something else that needs to be unpacked. The question by itself is perfectly reasonable and necessary to ask, but why am I asking this question in the first place? What is the process that has lead me to asking such a question? Am I asking this because I'm curious to know if our church points toward Christ in everything we do? Or am I asking this because I have a presupposition of what a healthy church should look like, and that people who come will speak well of it? Both questions aren't terrible, but it leads me to addressing something I cannot neglect.
What all of this has lead me to is the purpose of why I'm doing anything at all. When I look at my church and the ministry, what's our purpose supposed to be? Are we a church that's just for our group of families and friends to get together? Or do we exist to serve a greater purpose? Christ very clearly said that we need to bring his light into the world, and I just think we too often get caught up in the secondaries that we forget why we do anything to begin with.
God delights in us when we respond in faith; we exist as a church to show people this light. I just don't like that many churches, including my own, have defaulted to either a club that's just for the people who's part of the group, or a clinic where all we try to do is fix people. Let's get back to doing church the way that we are meant to live as Christians: fostering the relationship we have with Jesus Christ.
This was a really hard post for me to write - it took an hour and a half to get some barely comprehensible thoughts onto the page. I'm thankful that I'm in this period of searching, because I know there's learning and growing to be had. And thank you for bearing with me.
Tuesday, December 8, 2015
Of Dreaming and State of Mind
This will be more of a fun one - as opposed to my more "serious" (if you can call it that) posts about church and life, I guess. Haha.
I've always been a bit of a dreamer, thinking big and thinking supernatural. Most of the time, the dreaming doesn't really amount to anything practical, or even achievable, but hey, it's part of my personality. As they say, if you're an INFP on the Myers-Briggs scale, then you're born to dream. Usually, as most people have it, passions drive your dreams. So seeing how my dreams have evolved over the years has been really interesting - and slightly embarrassing.
I wanted to write on this because of how I'm approaching 2016 in regards to my church. We recently have started talking about possibly renovating the old sanctuary, where the English side meets, as part of our 40th Anniversary celebration. Upon hearing that news, I immediately became bright eyed and wanted to go through a whole process of redesigning my sanctuary. Due to being busy, and ultimately pushing this dreaming business off to the side, I haven't had much opportunity to really put pen to the paper with how we could change the look of our sacred worship space. I've been open about my desire to "upgrade" our space since I stepped foot into this church, so it's no secret to the leadership what I want to do.
Another fun, but challenging, part of dreaming for 2016 has been how to take care of my people and my ministries. Eventually, I landed on the idea of discipleship and that if our church can get to where the leadership wants to go, it will be a top 2 contributor to getting there. The first, obviously, being grace that is granted to us. Coming right up behind grace, to me at least, will be discipleship. The church has expressed this desire to evangelize and provide outreach into the community and into the world. Given the way I think, there is no better evangelism than through discipleship. With the context of North America, you really don't hear too often about the big revivals that happen where thousands of people come to Christ overnight. So, from where I stand, I need to equip and empower the people around me so they can either do the same or go out to the places that seek revival.
So I've been doing my best to keep my mind at a state where I am genuinely loving these people enough that I'd want to invest and bless their lives through teaching and training them. I've told my leaders that starting this next year, I'm going to begin the process of working myself out of my job. This isn't that I have no desire to stay here, but I think there will inevitably come a time where God needs my skill set somewhere else. So when the day comes that I leave, I want to have the confidence that this church is well equipped to do what I've been doing.
One of the bigger challenges of me doing this is that it involves a lot of spending time to meet with people. If they don't want to meet with me as badly as I do with them, then it's going to be a one-way thing - and this is where the relationship and love for each other comes in. Another challenge is the style of leadership that I approach discipleship in a practical manner. With where I am, people have a strong lean towards the side of me being the leader to do exactly that: lead. Telling people what to do and, in some ways, commanding them is what I see prevailing in my eyes. The way that I prefer to go about it isn't through dictatorship, though. I love preaching and the pulpit work, but where the real growth happens is in the coffee shop when I'm talking to you about how we can all do this together, each pulling their weight. If that means me telling you in a dictator fashion to get off your butt, then so be it. But not everyone responds to that, so I need to find out what makes each person click.
So that's my dream. I want Newbern, in reaching 40 years, to turn the page a little bit and see that doing church may need to be looked at a little differently. As our younger half of the church begin to take on more leadership, this is the shift I think we will need to see taking place in the next few years.
It's crazy how this has become one of my dreams in life, to see a flourishing church. I'm the kid that used to dream about being a rockstar, playing guitar on stage and having people chant my name. Yeah, those days are long gone. My biggest desires in life are now pleasing God, having a growing and healthy church, and growing a healthy family where I can play soccer with my kids in the backyard. I don't ever want to stop dreaming, it's a wonderful thing. When I dream, I get inspired and move into action. For a person that is generally laid back and lazy, I welcome this into my life often. I just have to be careful that I don't get carried away in this fantasy land and neglect what's in front of me in the real world.
CRAZY, I tell you!
I've always been a bit of a dreamer, thinking big and thinking supernatural. Most of the time, the dreaming doesn't really amount to anything practical, or even achievable, but hey, it's part of my personality. As they say, if you're an INFP on the Myers-Briggs scale, then you're born to dream. Usually, as most people have it, passions drive your dreams. So seeing how my dreams have evolved over the years has been really interesting - and slightly embarrassing.
I wanted to write on this because of how I'm approaching 2016 in regards to my church. We recently have started talking about possibly renovating the old sanctuary, where the English side meets, as part of our 40th Anniversary celebration. Upon hearing that news, I immediately became bright eyed and wanted to go through a whole process of redesigning my sanctuary. Due to being busy, and ultimately pushing this dreaming business off to the side, I haven't had much opportunity to really put pen to the paper with how we could change the look of our sacred worship space. I've been open about my desire to "upgrade" our space since I stepped foot into this church, so it's no secret to the leadership what I want to do.
Another fun, but challenging, part of dreaming for 2016 has been how to take care of my people and my ministries. Eventually, I landed on the idea of discipleship and that if our church can get to where the leadership wants to go, it will be a top 2 contributor to getting there. The first, obviously, being grace that is granted to us. Coming right up behind grace, to me at least, will be discipleship. The church has expressed this desire to evangelize and provide outreach into the community and into the world. Given the way I think, there is no better evangelism than through discipleship. With the context of North America, you really don't hear too often about the big revivals that happen where thousands of people come to Christ overnight. So, from where I stand, I need to equip and empower the people around me so they can either do the same or go out to the places that seek revival.
So I've been doing my best to keep my mind at a state where I am genuinely loving these people enough that I'd want to invest and bless their lives through teaching and training them. I've told my leaders that starting this next year, I'm going to begin the process of working myself out of my job. This isn't that I have no desire to stay here, but I think there will inevitably come a time where God needs my skill set somewhere else. So when the day comes that I leave, I want to have the confidence that this church is well equipped to do what I've been doing.
One of the bigger challenges of me doing this is that it involves a lot of spending time to meet with people. If they don't want to meet with me as badly as I do with them, then it's going to be a one-way thing - and this is where the relationship and love for each other comes in. Another challenge is the style of leadership that I approach discipleship in a practical manner. With where I am, people have a strong lean towards the side of me being the leader to do exactly that: lead. Telling people what to do and, in some ways, commanding them is what I see prevailing in my eyes. The way that I prefer to go about it isn't through dictatorship, though. I love preaching and the pulpit work, but where the real growth happens is in the coffee shop when I'm talking to you about how we can all do this together, each pulling their weight. If that means me telling you in a dictator fashion to get off your butt, then so be it. But not everyone responds to that, so I need to find out what makes each person click.
So that's my dream. I want Newbern, in reaching 40 years, to turn the page a little bit and see that doing church may need to be looked at a little differently. As our younger half of the church begin to take on more leadership, this is the shift I think we will need to see taking place in the next few years.
It's crazy how this has become one of my dreams in life, to see a flourishing church. I'm the kid that used to dream about being a rockstar, playing guitar on stage and having people chant my name. Yeah, those days are long gone. My biggest desires in life are now pleasing God, having a growing and healthy church, and growing a healthy family where I can play soccer with my kids in the backyard. I don't ever want to stop dreaming, it's a wonderful thing. When I dream, I get inspired and move into action. For a person that is generally laid back and lazy, I welcome this into my life often. I just have to be careful that I don't get carried away in this fantasy land and neglect what's in front of me in the real world.
CRAZY, I tell you!
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